Worst than a stressed out bride, there is the overexcited friend. She needs to be the center of attention by helping the bride enjoy her big day. And yes drama soon follows. Here is a story of Suzie who couldn’t find a ride to her party.
I had a friend – let’s call her Suzie – that so disappointed in her friend Mary. Mary was getting married and didn’t give her a plus one to her wedding. Suzie thought it was selfish She was stringing along her latest guy – Bob – in hopes that he could drive her to and from the wedding which was over an hour’s drive from Suzie’s house. Sadly, Bob dumped her before Suzie could dump him. She didn’t have anyone to drive her to Mary’s wedding.
However, the wedding was next month’s problem. This month, she couldn’t find a ride to Mary’s bachelorette party. Yes, she had a license, but Suzie wanted to drink that night. This all girl’s event was over an hour away in heavy city traffic. She could have taken public transportation. She could have taken a taxi. Hell, Uber just came to the city, and Suzie could have taken one, feel in love with the back-up drummer musician moonlighting as an Uber driver. No, she had to have someone drive her, because that is what friends do.
I was asked 3 times to drive her. She got mad at me for saying no. Others were also asked and told her no. She didn’t get mad at them; however, she was very perplexed why no one would drive her to this party. In her own mind, Suzie was the giving friend who invited everyone over, showed them hospitality which banked her favors for later on. I never saw it that way. May others did. She wanted to give me frozen yogurt as payment. I still said no. Her desperation to get to this wedding wasn’t worth a cheap, chemical sugary concoction. Either way, ex-boyfriend, Bob, drove her to the wedding for a $50 Starbucks gift card. Suzie clearly wasn’t the best friend; and her and Bob have co-dependency issues. That wasn’t the issue. The amount of drama to get to a party is.
Suzie’s was stressed out as a bridezilla and she wasn’t even getting married. Her friend was. Yet, she really created drama from this wedding for no one else but herself. Yes, Mary was her good friend, and yes, it was important for Suzie to be at the bachelorette party to support Mary. However, she could have done this by simply getting in her car, driving to the party, having a single glass of wine, and enjoying the party, wi. She wanted to drink a lot and didn’t want to drive. While there were people who were going to the party she could have asked for a ride, she couldn’t bother with them.And then, there was the story of how she got to the wedding, but that is another post.
Simple things were made to the extreme because of a wedding. People don’t have to be there; they HAVE to be there. Their presence is necessary for others to celebrate. Little by Little it becomes less about the people getting married and more about them. I never heard once how excited Suzie was to be at the wedding. It was only a nightmare that she couldn’t find a ride there. I don’t know if Mary ever knew how much drama Suzie was causing to be at this party. I just wish Suzie it was more about celebrating Mary than having her own needs met.